Eneh Akpan Writes: Fear

Showing posts with label Fear. Show all posts

Sunday, April 21, 2019

Day 20: F.E.A.R

I don't like your face
I don't like your taste,
That metallic twang
Welling up to flood my tongue.
I don't like the unreserved place
Of honor the human race
Gave you to bring you fame.
I don't like your game
I think it all a total shame.
I don't like the craze
For flight when you raze;
I don't like the rat race
That bring amazing disgrace.
Ama be on your case
And stay focused in case,
You creep and you came.
I don't like your name
I don't like the choices we make
That put the icing on the cake.
We cede and it's how you maintain.
I'll be damned if that ain't insane.
I don't like the ace
You seem to weave like lace
Into the fabric of our days.
I don't like your trait
And I'm being straight;
The way teeth chatter,
And tongues quiver,
And courage shatter,
When you prey on the innocent.
It ain't no sentiment.
I don't like your face.
So pack up n' leave without a trace.

Akpan

Sunday, February 3, 2013

20 Final Lines From Horror Novels

It was a trifle easier coming by grabbing first lines for my article Explosive First Lines of 30 Great Books which I posted on this blog in 2012 than it was finding equally absorbing and memorable last lines albeit, from horror literature for this post.

Because reading a final line could be a little bit like trying for Egyptian hieroglyphics 'specially, if you've never read the quoted novel before, you will find that some paragraphs are a little on the lengthy side. It's meant to give you a whiff on events leading up to the final scene. So you won't be kept too deep in the dark. And don't think because these are collected from horror stories, there would be an excessive gilding of dark matter. There is a hiatus from all the madness, you see.

1. Desperation by Stephen King

"Do you understand the reference, David?"
David took the blue pass. "Of course. First John, chapter four, verse eight. 'God is love.' "
She looked at him for a long time. "Is he, David? Is he love?"
"Oh, yes," David said. He folded the pass along its crease. "I guess he's sort of . . . everything."
Cynthia waved. Mary waved back and gave her a thumbs-up. Steve pulled out and Mary followed him, the Acura's wheels rolling reluctantly through the first ridge of sand and then picking up speed.
David put his head back against the seat, closed his eyes, and began to pray.

2. Dark Mountain by Richard Laymon

He went for the stairs, took them three at a time, and reached for the door handle. The door swung away from him. "Sorry it took so long," Smeltzer said. "Had to use the john." "No problem." Jake turned away, not even trying for a glimpse of the wife, and trotted down the stairs. From behind him came her voice. "This really is the pits." "Better safe than sorry," Smeltzer said. "Of course."

3. Girl of My Dreams by Richard Matheson (from The Unexplained)

It was the arm of a dead woman that he clutched. With a gagging sound, he jerked his hand away. He gaped at her, unable to speak or think. Then, as he backed away, his eyes were drawn to the calendar on the wall and a phrase crept leadenly across his mind: one of these days. Quite suddenly, he began to laugh and cry. And before he fled, he stood at the window for an hour and twenty minutes, staring out, wondering who the man was, where he was right now and just what he was doing.

4. Vittorio The Vampire by Anne Rice

Pray it never takes a slaughter or a rape for you to see this light in those around you. God forbid it that it should demand such a price. Let me pay the price for you instead.

5. Strangers by Dean Koontz

Soon, when Dom had passed the gift to her, as she would ask him to, she'd be able to heal with her touch. More important, with only her touch, she would be able to pass unto others the power to heal themselves. The human life-span would increase dramatically overnight-three hundred, four hundred, even five hundred years. Except for accidents, the specter of death would be banished to a distant horizon. No more would the Annas and Jacobs be wrenched away from the children who loved them. No more would husbands have to sit in mourning at the deathbeds of young wives. No more, Baruch ha-Shem, no more.

6. Hannibal by Thomas Harris

We'll withdraw now, while they are dancing on the terrace-the wise Barney has already left town and we must follow his example. For either of them to discover us would be fatal. We can only learn so much and live.

7. Mr. X by Peter Straub

But since you have put a question to me, I can ask one in return. Are you sure-really sure-you know who told you this story?

8. The Great and Secret Show by Clive Barker

It would not be long before dawn, and at the first sign of the sun they'd have to go to sleep. But until the light came-until the real insisted upon their imaginations-they stood watching the darkness, waiting, half in hope and half in fear, for that other sea to rise from dreams and claim them from the shore.

9. Shadows by John Saul

From the first time since she'd brought him home from the Academy, Brenda MacCallum knew that her son was going to be alright.

10. The Host by Stephenie Meyer

"It's a strange world," I murmured, more to myself than to the other native soul. "The strangest," he agreed.

11. Dr. Death by Jonathan Kellerman

"So no way you'll stop."She played with her hair. "Who knows what I'll do?"

12. Bloodline by Jill Jones

Jonathan rolled over on the bed and tugged her into his arms. "It doesn't matter," he said, grinning and running his hands through her hair. "I have all I want in my arms right now."

13. The Reapers by John Connolly

After a time, he nodded, both to himself and at the man who he knew was following his progress: Louis, the killer, the burning man. Louis, the last of the Reapers.

14. Shadow Prey by John Sandford

The thing called Stephanie Bekker heard the words "Jesus Christ," and then it was gone forever, leaving a single bloody handprint six inches below the Princess phone.

15. Covenant with the Vampire by Jeanne Kalogridis

The overwhelmingness of it (the perfume on the other character's body) offended my predatory senses, but the spicy fragrance could not hide for me, the scent of one undead; a non-odour, born of absences-the absence of warmth, of the strong animal smell of the living.

16. Others by James Herbert

Me? I'm enjoying the short time I have left. When the pain eventually gets too bad, then that's when I'll use drugs again, but only those prescribed by the medics. I'm still nervous of death, of course, but I'm no longer afraid. I've glimpsed it, remember? Besides, I've got someone waiting.
Metaphorically speaking, of course.

17. Killer Dreams by Iris Johansen

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes as the water flowed over her. She'd tell Joe about Montalvo's call over dinner, but right now she wanted to relax and forget about everything but Joe . . .

18. Heart-Shaped Box by Joe Hill

"Your bag," the boy said. "You might need something in it."Alinger smiled fondly, went back up the steps, took it from the boy's cold fingers."Thank you," he said. "I just might."

19. The Shadow Out of Time by H. P. Lovecraft

No eye had seen, no hand had touched that book since the advent of man to this planet. And yet, when I flashed my torch upon it in that frightful abyss, I saw that the queerly pigmented letters on the brittle, aeon-browned cellulose pages were not indeed any nameless hieroglyphs of earth's youth. They were, instead, the letters of our familiar alphabet, spelling out the words of the English language in my own handwriting.

20. Dracula by Bram Stoker

"We want no proofs. We ask none to believe us! This boy will some day know what a brave and gallant woman his mother is. Already he knows her sweetness and loving care. Later on he will understand how some men so loved her, that they did dare much for her sake."

Akpan

Saturday, January 5, 2013

The Dark Fascinates the Writers of Horror

The fictional character James Lowry encounters...

Photo: Wikipedia

Darkness commands its own peculiar kind of emotion: fear and awe.

Writers of the shock/suspense genre have harnessed this natural process and resource through all ages and generation. The dark seems to be a staple of the horror genre. Yet, we know it's not every scene in a story meant to terrify us that happens in the dark. There are frankly, quite a few stories which take place in the light that send the chill down our spines faster than would have been the case if the event occurred in a dimly-lit alley.

Men and women called into the ministry of fear understand people's reservations about dark, lonely places especially, the spots that have been deserted for quite a while. Such places bypass our rational minds and cry out to our subconscious with tales often difficult to believe but impossible to push to the back burner.

First, there is Fear of the Unknown, this is possibly the strongest case a horror writer can present for attaching so much importance to the dark. In moments of high-octane version of terror, a crumpled jacket lying on the floor of the closet could bear a really strong resemblance to the baby, dead and motionless or to some colossal creeping shadow that's waiting for the right moment to pounce on a victim and cause unthinkable harm.

The Element of Surprise is another very strong case. In the dark, nothing is what it seems. The writer of horror can manipulate the mind of his character(s) and reader(s) to believe one thing is really going on while in matter of fact, the reverse is the case (whatever the reverse might be).

"If there had been no such thing as darkness, the makers of horror movies would have needed to invent it." (italics mine)
Stephen King,

Danse Macabre

All in all, it is the idea, I call it the general phobia we all reserve in our deep subconscious for the dark that fuels the drama in the horror genre. Writers in this genre seem to have their fingers on the stuff that freezes our breath in our lungs and stops our heartbeats if only, for a fraction of a second.

Think of all the dreadful places thoughts of the dark dredge up in your mind-places like the inside of a closed coffin, the bottom of a well, the depths of the dungeon, the inside of a cave, blindness, the inside of a closet, the closed boot of a car, the depths of the ocean, the basement, concussion, coma, death. Is it a wonder we consider evil a dark matter? We even believe painful memories are stashed away in the dark places of our psyche.

The dark (be it in our minds or outside of it) is a world, a universe on its own and it never comes without its magic and do not forget, its box of misery.

Keep your pen bleeding.

Akpan

Saturday, August 11, 2012

Top Ten Things That Terrorize

THE TOP TEN COUNTDOWN

10. STAGE FRIGHT –

This group would include speaking/performing in public; interacting with new people and other related stuff involving a large group people. A lot of folks are terrified to be under public scrutiny which is practically what it feels like to be up, front and center performing in public.

9. BETRAYAL/DISAPPOINTMENT/RESENTMENT –

I lumped this trio together because I suppose, in a queer kind of way, they’re related. They are all items you can tick off your finger as relations-oriented issues. People disappoint on a daily basis and though we wrap ourselves up in protective shells, we still get hurt. We walk into relationships half-expecting that in the next second we’ll be sweeping shattered pieces of our hearts off the floor with a dustpan and broom. This is basically, a fear of commitment.

8. HEIGHTS/DEPTHS/ENCLOSED SPACES –

They belong to a category of specific phobias, called space and motion discomfort. - Wikipedia

Fear of height probably includes fear of flying. And fear of depths could be further split into two;

1. The fear of volumes with large depths such as stairways and deep caves.

2. The fear of depths

- Wikipedia

7. ADOLESCENCE/PUBERTY (GROWING UP) –

Fear of growing up and fear of being displaced in your parents’ lives. Many of us had this fear and some never get over it, even though, the extreme case is what we’re really discussing. I once read some place where someone stated they were scared of growing up and their parents dying. This is another way to present this phobia.

6. ANIMALS/OTHER CREATURES –

Spiders, dogs, mice/rats, cats and the likes, and of course, snakes and sharks. Stephen King said he can stand snakes but is terrified by spiders! Fear is a mystery and it continues to baffle us through all generations.

5. THE DARK –

The dark throws a scare into millions of people (especially children?). In the dark is when our deepest fears grow talons and come out to play. Loneliness, depression, nightmares and of course, freaks and psychos wield their greatest horror in the dark. And so, people tend to see evil in every shadow.

4. STRANGERS/OTHER PEOPLE –

Roland Poppo is now a famous name across the internet as the homeless guy who got his face chewed off by a stranger. In matter of fact, we are much more terrified if the adversary is a thinking, calculating being. If he is one of us. A human can see into our thoughts and read our every move, which makes psychos more terrifying than uncalculating wild beasts. Fear of foreigners or strange people comes out when we are under stress.

3. THE UNKNOWN –

If the first rule of warfare is know your enemy, then not knowing who or what you’re up against tips the scale. People are afraid of entering and exploring a new ground, because they think they might get in trouble. They are afraid of losing what they already have by jumping into the unknown.

2. DEATH –

Everybody dies, eventually. Yeah, but I aint afraid to die, just trying to make sure I get it right. The fear of death is pervasive in a world where millions of lives can disintegrate at the touch of a button. Terrorists aint helping matters, either. But death is not (in my opinion, anyway and this is backed up by some research) the most fearful thing which is why I placed it in the number 2 spot.

1. FAILURE –

Why do you suppose the rate of suicide has tripled in recent years?

I just finished reading ROADWORK by Stephen King. Although, King doesn’t come right out to state it in black and white, Bart Dawes, the main character in the story offed himself because he saw himself as a failure.

First, he fails to secure a new place for his laundry company (on purpose) and threw away his job;

Secondly, his wife leaves him (in consequence of the fact that he failed to secure a new apartment for them. Again, on purpose.) and

Third, because he wouldn’t exhume the body of his son (who had died a few months before of a brain tumor) and rebury him (an ongoing road construction had forced him to relocate) he blew his apartment to hell taking himself along for the bumpy ride.

Nothing takes the sweetness out your mouth as not being able to discover the hidden you in a severely distracted universe. If you lose sight of yourself, death is only child’s play.

WHAT TRIGGERS YOUR DEMONS?

Without a doubt, this countdown would be different if you had done it. Failure is my number one and only fear cause I believe nothing is as fatal (not even death) as the unfulfilled life. And that’s probably, the reason I always see success as the sweetest revenge.

. . . AND HOW THE WRITER CAN THRIVE ON ‘EM

Check out this week’s edition of the New York Times Bestseller list and try to see how many of the story plots are triggered by any one of these fears.

As a writer, you can tailor your character’s pitfalls around one or four of these. You can be sure your story would appeal to someone out there. Bull's eye, mama!

Let your pen bleed!

Akpan

Friday, December 25, 2009

Making Talent Count

Talent, with its overinflated rating, has its place.

Give it too much significance and you are as dead as silence. As inspired as a couple of blank pages on a writer's desk.

As a writer, you have a responsibility. It calls you like the sound of a clarion, to something upward and truly fulfilling. You wouldn't want to trade that off for spiff if you knew any better. Being prolific ought to be unagitated. Like still waters thrusting into the deep of one’s soul to activate sediments of hard earned resources - your everyday experience of life - in literary enterprise.

You are what you write!

You can't rely on talent alone!

Certain things hinder a writer's progress in his/her quest for creativeness. There are diverse issues which are not unconnected which cripple a writer's productivity, eat away at the heart of his genius like cancer.

Fear is a mortal sin. So many writers have fallen like seed by the wayside because they were afraid of draught-petrified they might run out of stories. A far greater number of writers have given up their dreams of taking up writing as a career before they ever got started, scared of someone scoffing at their ideas. I do not for one moment believe that either of these two sets of writers lacked a writer's talent. What they lacked obviously is a fighting spirit.

Secondly, a lot of writers are stuck in a rut because they have priority issues.

Until you learn to treat your craft with the awe and respect it deserves, you will never beat the mediocre level. If you are one of those who take writing as a random pastime game (unless your goal is not to get published or to master the craft) be assured that your days as a writer are numbered. I just don't see it happening.

Goals mean everything. They are maps that point us to our dreams especially when we have them written down. If you see your goals on paper - where/who you want to be in five/ten years from now. And visualize your objectives, the short term goals that evaluate your progress monthly, weekly, daily, in black and white it's going to be near-impossible for fear of ridicule to penetrate your fortified defense.

Get your priorities straightened out. Writing is an adventure, the greatest of ‘em all. You go on an adventure with your bags packed, faculties prepared for whatever pops out from a corner in the woods.

Your writing periods should be planned. Set apart a time to scribble a few words everyday. You may have to squeeze time out of no time. Make it count.

Attend these suggestions with diligence. Soon you will discover that the problem is not talent related but an enthusiasm issue.

'Instead of saying, "I want to be a writer," and then sitting around wishing I were a writer, I’ve been really trying to throw myself into it. . . It’s taken me a long time to get around to writing. I’m forty-one years old and this is my first collection of stories. I don’t think I could have gotten to it much earlier. . . '

The words of Kevin Canty. I think we all could plunge ourselves into the inspiration of these words in absolute abandon and allow the waves of exuberance sweep us off the shores into the seas of deliberate prolificacy!

Merry Christmas!

Keep your pen bleeding!

Akpan

Monday, December 7, 2009

Fear is a Writer's Toy

I remember the many times I sat before my computer and dreaded touching the keyboard afraid of what strange words might find it’s way to the screen.

Many of those times I knew there was a story waiting to be written. I could see the actions played out in my mind, it was like watching a theater act during rehearsals. What then was the underlying cause of my unrest?

I was afraid that my 'limited' vocabulary would be insufficient in communicating the world on my insides to the mind of my readers. I felt I couldn't be true to the images flickering on the walls of my mind owing to a lack of words to 'appropriately' express them. Hence, many of those stories died before they were born; they experienced literary stillbirths.

Have you ever been hindered by a seeming 'remoteness' of your story-ideas? Have you ever had a moment you regarded a picture in your own mind as superior to your writing abilities?

The story might be mightier than the warrior but definitely not the storyteller.

If two distinct authors could reproduce the telling or the showing of a specified event using exactly the same format-vocabulary and writing style inclusive-I suppose then the idea of originality would be defeated. You probably share my sentiment, don't you?

Here are a few tips from Steven Barnes which I believe could transform any writer's fears into tools for mastery of the craft:

1. What will a writing career add to your life?

2. What is the greatest risk connected with your goal? Greatest potential reward?

3. There are voices in your mind speaking to you about your plans. Whose voice speaks most loudly?

After listing these three leading questions Steven has this to say:

The more clearly you understand the potential benefits of actually fulfilling your dreams, the easier it is to feel the motivation necessary to accomplish them.

In the following lines he takes a step further suggesting that the writer ought to turn his fears into his character's fears thereby enhancing the plausibility of his story:

1. What does your lead character want, and how will her desires affect her life?

2. What danger lies ahead for your character?

3. What ghosts from your character's past keep her from seeing things clearly?

Remember, ideas in your mind sound different on paper. You can only tell a good idea from a bad one after you put it down.

Put it down. I guess that's the hardest part. The hardest moment is always before you start. This blog is my little way of learning how to conquer my personal demons.

Until next time.

Write Everyday!

Keep your pen bleeding!

Akpan